Your Child's Self-Esteem
I hope you are well, safe and happy. If you’ve heard me talk about my five pillars for personal safety, you know that one of those pillars, is your level of self-confidence. Your self-love, self-esteem and self-worth all have a direct correlation on your confidence level. How would you rate your child's self-esteeml? Do your children feel confident to speak their mind if they are in an uncomfortable situation? Do they feel comfortable immediately exiting an uncomfortable situation? Do they feel comfortable “making a scene” if need be?
When I was in middle school, and even into high school, I had low confidence. I did not have the skill set, or the confidence to speak my mind and express that I was uncomfortable in specific situations. This led me to being in downright dangerous situations.
Of all the judgments we pass in life, none is as important as the one we pass on ourselves. Self-esteem is the belief in ourselves that says we have the right to be successful and happy! It’s a feeling of being worthy and feeling deserving of having our needs met. Self-esteem is not a gift given by those outside of ourselves or something that can be taken from us by others. It’s to be done internally, inside ourselves.
Take this quiz to find out how healthy your self-esteem is. Each of these true/false statements can also open a dialogue to talk with your children about building their self-esteem. You won’t be scored at the end, but answer true or false to the following questions, and elaborate a bit on those that feel especially relevant for you and your children.
T / F 1. I have a right to honor my needs and wants, to treat them as important.
T / F 2. Nobody has the power to determine how I will think and feel about myself.
T / F 3. I am competent to cope with the basic challenges of life.
T / F 4. When I suffer some defeat or setback, I am able to rise again.
T / F 5. I will usually be liked and respected by the people I like and respect.
T / F 6. If someone I like doesn’t return my feelings, I don’t take it as a reflection of my personal worth.
T / F 7. I am worthy of happiness.
T / F 8. I take pleasure in being alive.
T / F 9. I can talk honestly about both my shortcomings and accomplishments.
T / F 10. I am able to accept criticism with openness and non-defensiveness.
T / F 11. I am able to give and receive compliments and expressions of appreciation.
T / F 12. I am open to and curious about new ideas, new experiences, and new possibilities of life.
T / F 13. I am able to laugh at myself and find the humor in life.
T / F 14. I am flexible and able to respond to life’s challenges and situations.
T / F 15. I am able to speak my needs and wants and set boundaries where needed.
T / F 16. I am not intimidated or overwhelmed by feelings of anxiety or insecurity.
T / F 17. I have a right to make mistakes.
T / F 18. I do not pretend my convictions are different than they are to win approval.
T / F 19. No one has the right to force on me ideas and values I do not accept.
T / F 20. My happiness and self-realization are noble purposes.
If you marked “true” on most of the questions and think you might have too much self-esteem, don’t worry. Saying you have too much self-esteem is like saying you’re too strong, or that your health is too good!
My online personal safety course can also help your children raise their self-esteem and confidence level!